California's Gone Bust

(With apologies to Dre and Tupac)


California...knows how to party
California....don’t got no money
In the citaaaaay of LA
In the citaaaaay of good ol’ Watts
In the citaaaaay, the city of Compton
They keep defaultin’, they keep defaultin’!

Now let me welcome everybody to the wild, wild west
Our bonds are untouchable like Elliot Ness
If you ain’t been foreclosed than you had some success
Pack some books fo’ yo’ cell if you gotta confess
We in that sunshine state with a bomb-site new street
The state where you always find a new build empty
And PIMPCO on a mission for them greens
Lean mean money-makin’-machine cheatin’ fiends
I been in the game sixteen years watchin’ crises
Banks gone down just like Vanilla Ice, geez
Now it’s ’09 and my creditors watch me
My credit rating’s dead just like Liberace
It’s no good, from Diego to the Bay
Your city is the bomb if your city makin’ pay
Throw up a finger if you feel the same way
For the crooks that bankrupted
Californ-i-a

California...knows how to party
California.... don’t got no money
In the citaaaaay of LA
In the citaaaaay of good ol’ Watts
In the citaaaaay, the city of Compton
They keep defaultin’, they keep defaultin’!

Make it make a payment
Make it make a payment
Make it make it Arnie
Make it Cali
Make it make a payment
Make a make a payment
Make it make it Arnie
Make it Cali

Out on bail, fresh out of jail California dreamin’
Soon as I stepped on the scene, I’m hearin’ lenders screamin’
They want my money and alcohol
My life as a west side playa flippin’ houses don’t work at all
Only in Cali where we riot not rally to live and die
In LA we payin’ Fargo not BAC (that’s right)
Dressed in Locs and khaki suits and ride is what we do
To find a mortgage with a rate less than nine point two
Famous because we don’t pay worldwide
Let ‘em recognize from Long Beach to Norway
The statement came and we said no way, it’s west side
So you know the row won’t pay out to no man
Say what you say
Just look at this bomb site today
Let me sell you half the streets in LA
From Oakland to Sac-town
The Bay Area and back down
Cali’s where house prices got a smack-down
Now we bust!

California...knows how to party
California.... don’t got no money
In the citaaaaay of LA
In the citaaaaay of Santa Barbara
In the citaaaaay, the city of Carmel
They keep defaultin’, they keep defaultin’!

Now make a payment...

Make it make a payment
Make it make a payment
Make it make it Arnie
Make it Cali
Make it make a payment
Make a make a payment
Make it make it Arnie
Make it Cali

Uh, Long Beach out tha house, uh yeah
Oaktown, Oaktown definitely lost they house, hahaha
Frisco, Frisco
Hey, you know LA down in this
Pasadena, price gone splat
Inglewood, Inglewood always up to no good
Even Hollywood tryin’ to lose a piece baby
Sacramento, Sacramento, where you at? Yeah

Throw it up y’all, throw it up, throw it up
Let’s show these fools how we do it on that west side
Remember when it was the best side

Yeah, that’s right
West coast, west coast
Uh, California’s bust....
California’s bust.....

If only Macro Man knew how to overdub lyrics on music videos.....

Comments

[semperpax:]

Stupid.

Jul 08 10:53 AM

[Steak:]

FANTASTIC! BRILLIANT! BRAVO!

Jul 08 11:46 AM

[Mad Hedge F...:]

It's all over but the crying. Perhaps it was deliberate that AMC Channel featured an Arnold Schwarzenegger film festival this weekend. Was the gratuitous violence of Terminators, Judgment Day, and the End of the World intended to drive us all to the negotiating table (“speak to the hand”)? We now have a new currency in circulation, Golden State "script", which is thoughtfully being printed in green as I write this. Of course the banks haven’t said they will accept this past July 10, so many spent the July 4th weekend at Big Five Sporting Goods stockpiling ammo and drinking water (everyone here already owns guns), possibly inspired by the Arnold movies. Many schools have already cancelled summer school, so of course, the malls are full of jobless kids lounging around and smoking cigarettes, with nothing to do. Towns are going without fireworks celebrations, and worried citizens are bracing themselves for a complete cessation of state services by the fall. Obama has wisely turned a blind eye to all of this, leaving we non taxing big spenders to stew in our own manure. For more on this see my earlier piece . With everyone of all parties thoroughly disgusted with their leaders, I’m surprised that the grass roots campaign for a state initiative to dump the two thirds majority required to pass a budget hasn’t welled up yet. Does France still have that guillotine thing? Is it available for rent? Will they take California "script"?

Jul 08 02:16 PM

[Neil459:]

As California goes, so goes the nation!

Jul 08 03:32 PM

[Tony Petroski:]

Very entertaining Mr. Man.

Didn't Tupac become Onepac and then Nopac? I don't follow the latest news as closely as I should.

The free spirits all went west for about a century but had nowhere to go once they hit the Pacific so now they stew in their own juice. There are still some sensible people elsewhere.

Jul 08 06:03 PM

[knight:]

this was amazing well done

Jul 09 12:01 PM

[T.Stamps:]

Mr Obama will rescue them.

Jul 09 12:39 PM

[Adam855:]

Hah.. this made me laugh.
Unfortunately the real situation is no laughing matter..

Jul 09 05:09 PM

[Northstar10000:]

Yes it is a laughing matter. the college kid down the street voted for obma, graduated from college and is working at Mickey D's.
Ha, Idiot.

Jul 09 09:59 PM