Just admit it. You got dumped. You aren't in "love". You never want to be again. Or maybe you never were. You're a Valentine Grinch, and with good reason. And if you could pay a visit to every Who down in Who-ville, you'd drive a stake through every one of their Valentine hearts, melt their chocolates, and over-water their flowers. And you'd love every second of it. There's a stock for every occasion, so while you are overcome with bitterness and cold pricklies, here are five stocks that will improve your outlook even more…or make it worse. Whichever.
Maybe you want to head down into Whoville, and disrupt all the Valentine's meals in all those non-smoking Who restaurants, by chain-smoking your way from one to the other. And while you're at it, hand out a few free samples that you buy from Altria (MO). This is a Forever Hold stock that produced $3 billion in free cash flow in the TTM, and will keep you in the money with its 5.6% yield.
While you ruin the Whoville Valentine meals with your cigarette smoke, you may as well make a boor of yourself by getting drunk. Grab a bottle of Johnnie Walker, produced by Diageo (DEO), or any of the dozens of other famous brands the company owns, and get hammered. Yeah, the stock is a bit pricey on a PEG ratio basis, but the truth is that spurned lovers of all kinds will always turn to the bottle to drown their sorrows, so the company will continue to be a cash machine. It produces between $2 billion and $3 billion in FCF every year, and returns some of it to shareholders as a 3.4% dividend.
After you've ruined everyone's special day, hop in your sled and zip on over to Wynn Resorts (WYNN) and gamble the night away. The company got hit with a shareholder lawsuit and informal SEC inquiry over some "donations" made to the University of Macau. I say the whole thing is overblown, driven by a disgruntled shareholder. The stock is 30% off its high and is a fantastic operation, with Mr. Wynn the ultimate shrewd investor and capital deployer.
When you get back home to your cave on Grinch Mountain, wouldn't you just love to lob a Tomahawk cruise missile down on those Whos? Or several of them? Then buy Raytheon (RTN). They have plenty of missiles to spare, and with mankind in a perpetual state of war, the company won't have any shortage of business. Heck, they even just restarted production of the laser-sighted Maverick for our armed forces. The company trades right around its growth rate, has plenty of cash, easily meets its debt service, generates a ton of free cash flow each year and pays a 3.5% dividend. KA-BOOM!
Finally, after blowing Whoville to bits, all those little buggers will file insurance claims. They probably are insured with GEICO, because they like the little gecko. So buy into Berkshire Hathaway (BRK.A) so you can profit off their misfortune (plus, you can get a seat at Uncle Warren's annual meeting and ask a nasty question). When it comes to disasters and accidents, they are also in man's nature. Warren knows how to manage an insurance company better than anyone. Why not profit from his expertise?
Disclosure: I have no positions in any stocks mentioned, and no plans to initiate any positions within the next 72 hours.