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I just received a mass emailing by an old associate in the financial publishing business. It contained tantalizing glimpses of a new product the team back home at the ranch is working on. Also included was the promise of a brand-spanking new trading information service, run by a mysterious man writing under a somewhat mawkish pen name. (Yes, he's that much of an insider.)

Two parts of the promise intrigued me: Access to his "Rolodex full of contacts". And his help to profit on IPOs, "Wall Street-style". Especially the last promise had me scratch my head. Because search as I might, these are lean days when it comes to IPOs.

CNNMoney.com lists exactly 3 upcoming IPOs -- American Water Works (NYSE:AWK), Digital Domain (DTWO), Intrepid Potash, Inc. (NYSE:IPI) -- all scheduled for April 21. MSNMoney.com still has two IPOs listed from April Fool's Day, but otherwise nothing.

IPOHome.com looks like an Empty Nester, with the identical 3 sad wall flowers mentioned above on deck, clutching plastic cups with Kool-Aid. In fact, the IPO party was so depressing, I'll leave you to explore the other Top 10 Online Sources for IPOs yourself.

And it doesn't look all that more productive in Russia or China this year. In fact, I am beginning to believe that I was wrong in calling the much-vaunted Penthouse AdultFriendFinder.com IPO a "one-room efficiency." If the competition consists of potash and water works, Penthouse Media Group Inc. could resemble the most run-down strip-mall pole dancer and still look like Cinderella to deprived investors and traders eager to line her thong with dollar bills. With even Forbes salting the mine with free publicity, all that's needed is a bottle of Colt 45!

Given the manageable amount of opportunity, I figure I may make do without a special service for a little while longer. Which brings me to my second question: Who still has a Rolodex?

Disclosure: None

Source: Upcoming IPOs: Slim Pickings Make Penthouse Look Like a Winner