Since whatever I would say about the latest trillion dollar bailout by the United States government would be unprintable, I am going to devote this column to describing what should have be done instead.

This financial meltdown is happening due to a lack of liquidity. The brokerage firms were buying long term assets with short term financing, a recipe for eventual disaster. In an ironic twist, Wall Street, the banker for the entire world, was unable to secure its own financing.

It is too easy to blame this crisis on just the mortgage brokers, the banks and the borrowers. But it is not that simple. A disaster of this magnitude has many guilty parties.

First on the hit parade are Alan Greenspan, Ben Bernanke, and the entire Federal Reserve Bank. Some of the fault lies with the easy money policy of the Greenspan years. The system is now choking on all that easy credit. Under his watch, Alan Greenspan allowed the unsupervised proliferation of obtuse and opaque mortgage products. The Federal Reserve has the power in its charter to supervise the creation of new products and they chose not to exercise it.

Last Friday, the Federal Reserve lowered the discount rate it lends to banks by a half percent to 5.75%. The more closely watched fed funds rate was left alone. After the Tokyo markets suffered their worst one day decline in seven years coupled with the recent volatility in the American market, the Fed felt it had no choice but to act.

But it is not time to sell. For those that did not sell earlier, it is too late now. Current holders of stock will have to be patient and wait until things sort themselves out. This is doubly true for holders of sub prime mortgages and collateralized debt obligations. [CDO]. There is no point in selling securities that have no current value. Order will be eventually restored to the mortgage market.

The markets are awash in cash that still needs to be put to work. By some estimates, the private equity funds have 20 trillion dollars in cash to put to work. There are unfounded fears that the buyout craze of private equity has come to end. These buyouts have partially fueled the bull market by reducing the supply of available stock.

John Mackey has revolutionized the grocery business, shown that distributing natural and organic food can be profitable and made available healthier food to millions of Americans, British, and Canadians. Whole Foods has been named by Fortune Magazine every year since the inception as one of the 100 best companies to work for.

I decided to make a fashion statement that I cared about the world that I live in and took to wearing jewelry made from Moissanite. This stone costs about one tenth the price of a real diamond and has similar thermal conductivity.

When I was at my jeweler last month, he mistook on initial glance my moissanite ring for a real diamond. Moissanite is a gem quality silicon carbide. It was originally discovered in meteorites at Canyon Diablo in Arizona more than one hundred years ago. According to Charles & Colvard Ltd.’s (CTHR) website, “you have never seen a jewel on earth with more fire, brilliance, and sparkle than moissanite. Even diamond dealers concede that it has more sparkle than an average diamond."

The stock opened at 36.45, an 18% premium to the IPO price.

As the name implies, the menu at Kona Grill has a Hawaiian influence. Indeed, many of the ingredients are flown in directly from the big island. Kona itself is the name of the storm that brings in the tropical rains.

The unusual menu consists of items like lemon grass crusted halibut, baked sea bass in miso sake marinade, Angus steaks, Five -Spice baby back bibs, and almond crusted pork tenderloin. Kona Grill also features American style sushi with a Sushi for Dummies menu that explains all things Sushi to the novice. All of this family fare is offered at relatively inexpensive prices. The average check is $22.

The summary in the New England Journal asserted that CAD did not find additional cancer. Even worse, it caused women to have unnecessary biopsies.

More than 212,000 women were diagnosed with breast cancer in 2006. Approximately 41,000 will die this year making it the second leading cause of terminal cancer. Each year 34 million women have a mammogram.

It is the number one watched show in the coveted 18-49 age group for the third year in a row. 33 million viewers have tuned into “American Idol” each week for the sixth season of the show. In the present era of infinite media choices, capturing an audience of over 30 million viewers on a weekly basis is the equivalent of climbing Mt Kilimanjaro in high heels.

According to Advertising Age, commercials on “American Idol” go for as much as $620,000 for a 30 second spot. "Desperate Housewives" comes in a far away second at a cost of $394, 000.

Former Israeli Prime Minister Netanyahu has recently been barnstorming the United States to call on the fiduciaries of America’s largest pension plans. Netanyahu is asking the state and city treasurers to stop investing in companies that do business with Iran.

On the surface, there is some plausibility to the analyst’s premise. The new masters of the universe are private equity guys. They are sitting on piles of cash. Banks are throwing money at them at low interest rates. There is nothing that they cannot buy -- except for a Zionist.

For certain Chief Executives of public companies, there is an appeal to working in private equity. Public company CEOs endure more public scrutiny than their counterparts in the private sector. Much maligned CEOs like Home Depot’s Robert Nardelli have joined private equity shops and vowed never to work in the public sector again.

For new money, I say buy -- this is the opportunity of the lifetime. A legendary trader once told that his three favorite days were the days that his children were born and October 19, 1987. He made his fortune and reputation during the crash of 1987 by buying heavily. Nathaniel Rothschild once said, “The best time to make money is when there is a blood in the streets.”

When Cellcom announced its offering, my initial, automatic response was to buy the stock on the offering. I had previously made a 40% return on my purchase of Cellcom’s competitor, Partner (PTNR).

How great it would be to profit from my high phone bills. Cellcom earned 91 million dollars on revenue of 974 million dollars for the first nine months of 2006. It seems that most of the revenue comes from me.