The market was up today because we are due for a brief rally until we resume our fall in to the abyss like King Midas' son Anchurus (only without saving the Earth) or like Alan Greenspan's reputation. The market has reached the point where some stocks have simply been oversold and with the lack of meaningful macro data and the beginning of earnings season, it should take less to get the market excited in the short term than it takes a teenage boy with a bad case of priapism to get excited. We basically have a tired market that is succumbing to VIX (not unlike a tired Gay succumbs to Dix). Today's rally is being driven by State Street announcing they will beat earnings and by retail sales defying all logic, common sense, and income levels and being estimated to have grown at their fastest pace in 4 years.
The International Council of Shopping Centers (known more familiarly as ICSC or "Who?") preannounced the results of the study they will release tomorrow, in affect scooping themselves in a strategic move to try to keep LeBron James's choice of teams for free agency out of the news and to make the ICSC more of a household acronym than PETA, ROTC, and NAMBLA . The ICSC remarked that retail sales "probably" came in at 3% to 4% growth for the month and will average 4% for the first five months of the year. Of course you all might remember that the ICSC also said Teddy Ruxpin will "probably" make a huge comeback, Walmart shoppers "probably" understand that one size doesn't fit all, and Lindsay Lohan will "probably" show up for her treatment any time now, so buyer beware.
Internationally, Europe has installed a cap on bank bonuses with bankers not allowed to take more than 30% of their bonuses in cash. The remaining 70% will now be awarded in stock, gold, or the still beating hearts of freshly clubbed baby seals. Europe bank stocks are also rallying because the rumor is that the haircuts they will have to take on Spanish bonds will be done by Ken Paves and not some dildo with a flowbee at Supercuts. It was leaked that Spanish bonds will only be written down by 3% and not the presumed 10% to 20% some people estimated while German bonds will get no haircuts and thus will go for the Chrystal Gayle look. In other international news, The Agricultural Bank of China raised $19.2B in their IPO yesterday which gives it a valuation richer than C, GS, or Christina Hendrick's bra.In US stock news, STT is rallying the entire...READ MUCH MORE....ANALYSIS OF MONEY MCBAGS FAVORITE KITD....
Disclosure: Long KITD