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Money McBags is the preeminent financial humorist and money maker in the world. While known for his ability to find and invest in undervalued equities, Mr. McBags is also a world class dick joke teller, an aficionado of lovely ladies, and avid reader of books without pictures in them. With... More
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When Genius Prevailed
  • 9/28/10 Midnight Report: Market stimulated by QE2 rumor. Rumor is that unlike that cocktease QE1, QE2 will provide happy ending 0 comments
    Sep 28, 2010 11:33 PM | about stocks: KITD, WAG, MON

    The market climbed today as investors all bet on the Fed continuing to manipulate its balance sheet like like RuPaul manipulates his/her junk in a gaff (and the things Money McBags had to look at while searching for that term/pic on the internet shall never be mentioned, so please laugh at that joke for the dignity Money McBags had to give up in writing it).

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    Equity strategists (and Money McBags uses that term loosely since it is more of an oxymoron than "sweet sorrow" or "comedian Dane Cook") were all over the media today talking about quantitative easing and how the likely inflation associated with it will help drive the stock market higher by further devaluing the dollar like Stephen Colbert brilliantly devalued Congress.  Of course, the non-hyped reality of QE 2 (which promises to be the worst sequel since Brokeback Mountain 2: Is That a Lasso in your Asso?) is that by purchasing more bonds, all the Fed is doing is turning the dollar in to a more worthless piece of paper than Barack Obama's birth certificate (according to teabaggers that is) and that these measures are short term optical boons for the market but don't do anything to solve the fundamental problems with the economy which are that unemployment is at unhealthy levels, the income gap keeps widening (like Kirstie Alley's eyes at a Krispy Kreme doughnut shop), and even with rates being held at 0% businesses simply can't grow if people aren't spending the devalued dollars they have.  Fuck, hasn't anyone in Bernanke's office ever heard of Japan?

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    So the Fed is going to manipulate the market while the actual economy continues to struggle as noted by consumer confidence once again falling below analyst guesses of 51 to 48.5.  This is the lowest confidence has been since February and is a result of unemployment remaining higher than a Jessica Simpson pant line, fewer CEOs expecting sales growth (and remember, these guys never saw a chart that couldn't score a hat trick), and consumer's losing their health care and thus no longer being able to afford ritalin to keep their confidence up.  So the Fed can try to push companies in to hiring all they want by continuing to devalue the dollar, but unless companies bite on that stimulus soon, consumer spend is going to disappear faster than civility or Meaghan Cheung's career and that is going to be about as good for the economy as Yoko Ono was for the Beatles or George Soros was for the Bank of England.

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    In the final bit of US macro news, home prices were up .6%, or down .1%, depending on if you like your numbers seasonally adjusted or not (and Money McBags likes his numbers over easy and rounded to the nearest 69).  The Case Shiller index was basically inline with analyst guesses (so good on you analysts, Money McBags knew the coin flip would eventually come up sideways) and provides...READ MORE...

    Disclosure: Long KITD
    Stocks: KITD, WAG, MON
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