Pat Shuff

The Fed: Sending Investors to the Slaughter?

Economists, Market Analysts Reach 2010 Waffles-R-Us Outlook Consensus

The Joint Overheated Waffle Iron Survey predicts the
same Fahreheit 451 the survey results have been pegged
at since first gathered in the Kennedy Administration,
resulting in the building code requirement of hard-wired
smoke alarms in all new construction. They recommended
remote monitoring of all new and existing alarms be
consolidated at the Federal Reserve along with all things
regulatory, aside from their morning constitutional or
anything constitutional.

In testimony before Congress, Chairman
Barney "Brutally" Frank tabled the proposal, displaying
more interest in the brutality than the frankness upon
upon which the TV Parental Guidelines Council promptly
and finally jerked C-Span's general audience rating
after years of complaints from any mature, thinking adult
of the need to shield their eyes from that network.

Investors examining the Waffle Iron report and stymied
by years of the casino lobby failing to enact meaningful
online gaming reform, perennially outbid by the deeper
pocketed financial services sector, placed their bets
on red, black or aiming in the general Direxion of the
bull's eye, double-00 and triple-000 lever actioned,
double-barrelled rushin' roulette figuring that with most of
the buck shot hitting home, what with The Family moving
back in, everyone must still be Fed.


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