yellowhoard's  Instablog

Congratulations all!

We've all made it through the year, so far, and the douche bags haven't taken us down yet. And that's no easy feat. This year has seen a bumper crop of candidates for the coveted DB 09 award. 

To qualify for DB 09, candidates must demonstrate a general contempt for their fellow man. And, because of his, or her, misanthropic tendencies,  countless decent people are caused to suffer directly or indirectly through their actions.

Past winners of this prestigious award include Robert Rubin for tirelessly campaigning to end Glass Steagal banking regulations. And, then again raking in over $100,000,000 for serving as Vice Chairman Of CitiCorp, as a payoff.

Rubin, the only two time winner, is a shining example for all of the future DB contestants. He represents the highest level of douchedom for his relentless pursuit of personal reward at the expense of the rest of humanity. Bob, put down that solid gold putter for a second and take a bow. 

This years candidates include:

George Soros

Mr. Soros worked tirelessly to become owner operator of the Democratic Party.

Thanks to George's work, we now have the most Marxist President and Congress in the history of the country. Were it not for the ridiculously expensive programs that his party has slam dunked through congress in their first year of control, his foreign investments and massive bets against the dollar would not have made him richer yet. So George, stand up from your platinum toilet, show the world your genuine Mink toilet paper, and take a bow.

Warren Buffet

Mr Buffet is nominated for pretty much the same reasons as Mr. Soros, only Mr. Buffet is a folksier version and relieves himself in a modest palladium toilet and wipes his hiney with 100% American made $100 bills. Stop being so gosh darn folksy for a minute Warren and take a bow for shoving this great ship of state down river to a fiery lake of hell. Hope that loan to Goldman Sachs is working out for you. No government help there with that AIG money, huh Warren? I know, ah shucks. BTW, isn't that Burlington Northern deal with stock and borrowed money just a bet on a collapsing dollar?

Janet Napolitano

Ms. Napolitano, before hardly squeezing her ass into her recliner at Homeland Security, declared that military veterans and Ron Paul supporters should be profiled by police agencies as potential terrorists.

Now you haven't taken out any actual terrorists, Fort Hood, but you have taken out the constitution and pooped on it just a little.

Good luck Janet!

If you would like to nominate a candidate for DB 09, leave your comment here and I will tally the thumbs up and down for each entry on New Years Eve.

This is a big responsibility. Let's make sure we get it right!

My motto is, No Douche Bag Left Behind.

OK, we're all nervous right now. We want to sit in a fair amount of cash, but we hate to see it lose it's purchasing power. Most of us are hedged with metals, but we're all aware of the potential bloodbath that could occur in metals if the carry trade unwinds.

What to do? 

How do I balance my portfolio for the coming storm?

Most of you know that I have been bearish on US equities and the dollar for a long time. I've invested instead in FXA, FXC, BZF, WIP, and US money markets for the bulk of my cash portfolio, around half of the overall portfolio. The US dollar is half of the half.

This makes me nervous.

So, I've been looking for a strong dollar equivalent to diversify further. I've landed on CYB. 

If you look at a chart of CYB, you'll notice that it went up during the first three month of this year when the markets were still crashing and the dollar was still showing strength. Since then, it has decoupled from the dollar and traded sideways as the dollar has fallen dramatically.

So, should we get a another rush to the buck and a collapse in the markets, I'm betting that CYB will be a safe haven that might even show a small profit.

Because the Chinese track the dollar, for now, this is a pretty dull investment. But, given the odds of a catastrophic dollar collapse, I'm betting that the Chinese will not go along for the ride and I'll be happier in their currency.

Your thoughts?

Glen Beck was just interrupted so we could all hear Obama give a boilerplate thanks for serving your country speech at an Air Force base in Alaska as Air Force One took on a few thousand pounds of fuel for the trip to Asia.

Looks like the price for the upcoming interview is clear.

The Dems were already retreating on healthcare legislation Tuesday before the polls had even closed in New Jersey and New York.

No vote in the senate is expected this year.

Same for Crap N Tirade.

Is this good or bad for the dollar?

My own take is that this is bad for the buck. I've viewed healthcare and energy taxes as nothing more than thinly disguised revenue generators since they were first brought up.

As a real estate developer, I'll have to admit that business has been slow for the last year or so. But that's about to change.Due to the budget shortfalls in California, I've stumbled upon an outstanding investment opportunity.


Just north of San Francisco is a lovely wooded area known as the Muir Woods. It is truly spectacular and you should see it.  I'm going to turn part of it into a world class golf course and country club.

Muir Woods Country Club will offer golf, tennis and fine dining amongst the giant Redwoods and Sequoia.

The facilities will all be made of state of the art green technology and use only redwoods that are harvested on site. Preliminary engineering estimates that the entire, all redwood, 120,000 square foot clubhouse and 500 car parking garage can be built with timber that will be processed from the clearing of the front nine holes. The timber from the back nine and driving range areas will be sold to lumberyards and cover the cost of most of the construction costs of the club.

If you share my dream of world class golf amidst the grandeur of these giant trees, let me know and I'll forward a prospectus and club membership details.

In spite of my solid balance sheet, this is a rather large investment and banks have been tight as a clam so I need help .If any of you have any interest in this and can afford to invest at least $500,000, for a period of five years, let me know.
 

When asked during the question and answer section of a recent beauty contest what is most important to her, Miss Alabama replied "world peace".

Given that President Obama was only in office about three weeks when he was nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize back in February, and hasn't really done anything for world peace since then, I think that Miss Alabama could be a formidable competitor next year.

Granted, she hasn't made a slide show, like Al Gore, which gets you an automatic Nobel Peace Prize. But, I still like her chances since she was emphatic that "world peace" is a really big deal and, if achieved, would be so awesome. 

I can't remember her name, but, given her outstanding resume, my selection for the Nobel Peace Prize 2010 is Miss Alabama!