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My Visit To Obama's House

During my recent quick run through Chicago, I stopped by Obama's house on Greenwood Avenue and 50th street in up and coming Hyde Park to say hello. I was thwarted by two concrete crash barriers, 16 cop cars, and army of elderly Chicago police happily pulling overtime. Shifty looking characters wearing long overcoats and sprouting wires out of their ears were everywhere. Needless to say, I did not get invited in for tea and cookies.

Every neighborhood bird nest, flagpole, and chimney sported video cameras, and Google Earth has wiped the block off the map. No wanting to risk my valued Secret Service clearance, I scuttled out of there before anyone started asking questions. Instead, I settled for a visit to the delicious Valois Cafeteria around the corner, the president's favorite diner, and his preferred bookstore at 57th Street Books. They carried all of his publications. Amazing!

I managed to run into someone, who knew someone, who once babysat Obama's kids. Need, a presidential pardon, a cushy ambassadorial appointment, a new alternative energy program, or a juicy government contract? I'm now your "go to" guy! Just make a discreet donation to my favorite 501 (3) (c) and it's a deal.