A. Ulianov: You know…I get a lot of women in the 25 to 30 age brackets coming to my office. They are typically fairly well-rounded, educated, and attractive. They have wide social networks and their basic needs are taken care of but they are all wondering about the same thing.
Almost all these women come to me with the same question: they need a man and they tell me what kind of man he must be. They tell me the following: he has to be smart, he has to be attractive, he has to be kind, he must be very rich and also well-known.
When I am asked this question, I typically reply as follows: “Let’s say that there are two or three million attractive ladies like you out there. On average, there are a lot less men like the ones you describe, hundreds times less.” Statistically speaking, it turns out that only one woman in a hundred women looking for this type of man will actually find one and ninety nine of them will be out of luck.
This topic brings me and my colleagues to a dead-end. We don’t know what to do with such ladies.
M. Laitman: They must receive treatment. You don’t need to explain to them that which they won’t understand – the fact is that these desires of theirs will not be satisfied. And even if they did find such a man, they wouldn’t be any happier. They only think that if they were to find a man according to the five criteria you just listed, they will be happy. After all, a person must feel happy and fulfilled. Money, beauty, a man, etc are all part of this. But all these things don’t guarantee spiritual fulfillment which is what a woman needs most of all.
A woman does want a home, children, a man and the entire surrounding environment for herself. Inside, she wants to feel all these things belong to her. As a rule, such men do not provide this for their wives. We know that they supply them with a house and hand over their checkbooks to them. They give this and want the women to just leave them alone. In actuality, men live, not so much inside the family but on the outskirts. They are distanced from the family’s needs and joys. This is why women need treatment and we must explain to them that what they want is not the means for fulfillment.
Kabblah student/BA in Kabbalah in the University of Tel Aviv/BA in Judaism in Bar Ilan University http://www.kabbalah.info/engkab/mystzohar.htm